Tuesday, October 22, 2013


Huffpo started it, Buzzfeed perfected it, Yahoo emulates it  - it's the as old as time (literally) but the newest trend since kale - it's a list! We all make lists whether it's a TO DO, a grocery, or a "reasons to date Rachel Green". But why does the internet love lists? Find out why we're coo coo for LISTAMANIA.

Am I supposed to read an article not knowing how long it is? I mean come on what is this? A book with 500 pages? If it's the difference between committing to an article on the "10 Best Colleges for Taxidermy" and "Get Your Degree in Taxidermy" I know going in that I am comitting to 10 topline clicks, nothing more. It's a fleeting advertisement for the attention span impaired. Look! This article has the confidence to tell you JUST how many points it's going to half halfheartedly make (with no facts).

There are 100 reasons to travel?! I mean I only need 3 at the most but I guess if the internet says there are a 100 --- shit is real. Validation for the mundane. Of course, I want to read all 100 reasons! Can I relate to any of the reasons? The excitement is palpable. Oh wait, I only made it to 15 - look - there's another article! "200 Ways To Change A Light bulb With 3 Polish People".

Okay, that may be a stretch.  Not since Letterman and my pun loving 10th grade algebra teacher has counting been so wild and carefree. It also gives you the freedom to list as many funny things as you can think of! You can range from 3 things to infinity things. Let's face it , Letterman's Top 10 set the bar high for lists of funny things and we're just getting to the counting renaissance, people! The internet is just trying to keep us entertained with endless amounts of things. More things, please!

Clocking in around 30m.


REASON 1: EGO TRIP: AM I ON THIS LIST?And for the best reason to DO ANYTHING.....*drum roll* ---- you may be in it!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! Why else do you look at people's pictures on the internet - you could be in them. TOP 10 COLLEGES YOU WENT TO? Sold. 4 TOWNS THAT ARE GOING BANKRUPT? MINE! THE ULTIMATE LIST OF EX BOYFRIENDS.....all mine. TOP 11 VEGAN FOODS THAT ARE ACTUALLY CARROTS?! I'VE EATEN THEM! Keep these lists coming and we'll keep sharing as long as they relate to us.

Sunday, October 6, 2013


Here we are again! It's pilot season. Every year, like the early stages of dating, I give everyone a chance. Very few make it to second base. In the past, I've gained Homeland and New Girl but also saw actors I love so much just flail in a miscast role.

Unlike last year where I was instantly evangelizing Nashville and completely taken with Girls, there's only a few I am DYING to DVR....

Here is my rundown of this year's pilot season:

Super Fun Night (ABC)  = Rebel without a cause.Rebel Wilson is without a doubt a revolution in comedy. She has been a relentless presence in the past 3 years. She has given us all the charming and surprising moments of all our favorite comedies like Pitch Perfect and Bridesmaids. Even hosting the MTV somethingerother.  What kills me is  -how is it that she gets cast in such a predictable comedy? We've seen this story before a thousand times: bigger girl has an awesome personality underneath her conformist personality and did you know she can prove everyone wrong? Meh. I'd rather see her in a comedy where she's the larger than life boss, girlfriend, doctor that you say undeniably - she's shining. We are just watching her through the glass of our tv and she's muffled.


HOSTAGES (CBS) =  Amazing.... for a CBS show.
Whyyyyyy oh wwhyyyyy do you have to be on CBS!? I begrudgingly dip my toes for How I Met Your Mother and now I am destined to watch infuriating 2 Broke Girls promos and watch as Amber Tamblyn kills her "marrying David Cross street cred" on Two and Half Men. I digress. I love a good suspense kidnapping kill the president hour drama and I have a real love of Dylan McDermott, Toni Collette and Tate Donovan (ask me about my Tate Donovan story another day) --- and this one hit me in the right spot. I want to know how this ends but I also want it to end. I can already tell,  I want this to be a one season show that takes its premise to the ends of the plot and never looks back. What I don't want is this Season 3 of Homeland where we are wondering how it all went so wrong?


HELLO LADIES (HBO) = Merchant has potential. 
Back when I lived in London circa 2002 I felt like I discovered something so completely different with The Office (by Ricky Gervais and Stephen Merchant). It felt like nothing I'd ever seen before, felt before. laughed before or even been written before (for my eyes, at least). That being said, I'd probably follow them to the ends of comedy for giving me David Brent. Separately,  would Merchant and Gervais satisfy?  Would I be so....consumed? I am 50/50 on HELLO LADIES. I think my assessment,  which I would contend is also my issue with EPISODES is that British humor is so self sabotaging it just doesn't sit right in an American plot line. I liked the relationship and deadpan commentary on dating life in Hollywood. I'll dvr the second ep, though.

Masters Of Sex (SHOWTIME) = Can I get a hell yes!
Period dramas like Mad Men and Downton Abbey show us just how far we've come not only with technology (electricity!) and with social issues (women can work!) but Masters Of Sex shows us just how much we still don't know about sexuality. Even though it was a medical necessity to have to watch people *ahem* do it, I would contend it would still be very weird today. We're an open society in 2013, but people today would still cringe thinking about that. What I liked about the pilot was just how un-piloty it was. It had the confidence not to have to tell you everything. 

HONORABLE MENTION: Finally, a dramatic role worthy of Lizzy Caplan's talents! Sheen aint so bad either. She's a comedic darling but i could always tell her flair for the dramatics were being underutilized.

MARVEL Agents Of S.h.i.e.l.d (ABC) = There's too much to fix.
As a non comic book fanatic I adored The Avengers, therefore, I figured I would be able to get into this show. Same cast, same ideas. I have a soft spot for Joss Whedon that most people call obsession, mine is just a soft spot. However, I couldn't and cant move past the casting of Chloe Bennett as Skye. No not in the way that us nerds get mad over Ben Afflek as Batman, more in the way that is seemed completely unrealistic and dully entertaining. She's just a dud. Too pretty for me to take seriously, honestly. I think this will go 2 seasons then Whedon will get tied to a passion project or another major blockbuster.
HONORABLE MENTION: Clark Gregg is ever so dazzling, still. 

Brooklyn Nine Nine​ (FOX) = On the fence.I have so many reasons to like this show. One: Andy Samberg is perfectly cast. Two: Chelsea Peretti gets to be Chelsea Peretti. Three: Joe Truglio rounds out the successes of The State cast. However, the reasons I don't want to see this show fail are the exact reasons for me, it falls short. Samberg is cast perfectly but the tone of the show doesnt support talents. Chelsea it turns out is an Aubrey Plaza clone and Trulio does better as an absurdist character like on Burning Love or Wanderlust. Lastly, there are just too many cast members who look alike. Maybe I just miss the HAPPY ENDINGS days....I have heard it turns a corner in the 3rd episode so I will gladly take 30m to find out.